willc.me

Hark back to the days when the only advertising on your computer came in static box form. It was there, but not calling out to you. It was nondescript and blended into the background. Through the years, as the technology evolved so has the ruthless marketers approach to sell us things.

We spend plenty of our waking lives on computer, normally on the Internet. Whether that be emails or Youtube or Facebook, a vast amount of time is spent online. This obviously opened up a new market for people to sell us things. And when the ad men realised that we were going to sit on computers all day they started getting more clever in delivering products to us online.

First it was the static banners selling whatever they did. They started off as playground inspired designs. Normally just text. Then came the pictures. Normally for porn. Then the gif animation where they would move to catch your eye. Then they’d start calling out to you or make horrible noises. And now they entice you by inviting you to shoot rubber ducks or even play pool.

Next it was the turn of Google. Now anyone could use Google ads to be paid to place ads on their site. And get money for it. So adverts started appearing on even the most humble page.

But at least they’re still banners. They sit there and we get used to them and learn to ignore them. But the ad men realised this too. They needed a new way to sell us things. Useless things that we don’t want.

Now we have quality streaming videos from the likes of Channel 4 we’re made to watch TV ads on our laptops. There’s no fast forwarding, you have to be brainwashed before your brain is rotted by Come Dine With Me. And they hardly change the ad. Watching programs the other day I saw the same Fosters ad about 8 times. I didn’t want to buy Fosters so much as drown anyone involved in its existence.

But this is the way to make money on your sites on the net so it’s only going to get more prevalent. Spotify started the trend, creating a radio station where you choose what music you want to hear and without a narrating idiot. For free, as long as you listen to the ads. And the latest people to do it are Youtube. They may get a billion views a day but it seems that’s how much money they lose too. So they’re adding more ads.

I wonder where we go next. How will the ad men create more ingenious ways to sell us things? Although, as much as I hate the ads, it’s good that the service is is still free!

Monopoly has always been cool. Even when you’re a kid and you’re crap at it. It’s one of those rainy day activities that at certain points of your life you are bound to play. However, Hasbro, the manufacturers have a problem. What do you do when everyone in the world, well the civilised world, has a copy of Monopoly already? You bring out “Monopoly: City Streets”.

Monopoly: City Streets was launched yesterday. It combines Monopoly with Google Maps turning the whole world into a giant Monopoly board. Better still you can build on the land you buy. Anything from sports stadiums to jails. You can compete against your friends and indeed the world to make your property empire the biggest and bestest.

However, there was a little problem. In so much that it launched yesterday and is down as this is written. It seems that there is more of a global following of Monopoly fans than the weird, white mustachioed, Monopoly pedo man, who enticed us as children with kids monopoly round a fairground, would have thought there were.

One minute into the launch the servers were slowing down. Since then there’s been a movement from a slow crawl to a gradual halt. I’m sure there are some worried Monopoly Men out there desperately trying to get more servers online or something like that.

So what’s all the fuss about? Well each player is given $3 million Monopoly Dollars. Yes, inflation in Monopoly land has been even greater than that of Zimbabwe. You buy land based on it’s value. Downing street is a mere $231,000 while Pennsylvania Avenue, joining the White House with the US Capitol costs a whopping $2 Million. No doubt Obama has a team working on it so he can build a massive statue. If someone else has the property you want, like the street you live on then you can put in an offer for them to sell it. If they don’t accept the offer within 7 days then you get the street for whatever offer you placed. So that’ll have you hooked to the game quicker than you’d get addicted to crack.

You earn money from your properties on a daily basis and can increase that by building skyscrapers and castles. Players don’t land on each other but are merely given money as rent from imaginary Google map tenants. To make the game more competitive, as let’s face it, Monopoly is a competitive game to get one over on your family members, they have kept the trusty Chance Cards. Chance Cards in City Streets allow you to demolish other peoples buildings or build unglamorous buildings such as prisons or sewage works on an opponents street making it less desirable and effecting the rent they get.

It also kindly tells them who has just effected their rent income so they can retaliate like some sort or slum lord pimp. Which should be exciting. This round lasts for 4 months and that has started now. Well, when they get the server situation fixed. Until then I’m going to get repetitive strain injury from refreshing the screen. I’ll see you on the City Streets.

Click here to play!